Guest “Blogger” – HOST MOM MARIA
As Jessica’s first host family, we were very excited to meet her.
Ole, the host father told our sons, Daniel, now 14 years old and Benjamin, soon to be 11 years old, that they were about to have a sister. Both boys looked surprised at me, Maria - Mom, are you pregnant? No, I said, you are going to have an older sister, and we explained.
Our decision to have an exchange student came a little bit earlier than anticipated, as it turned out that almost any family with children in Denmark has a dog or a cat, which was a problem with Jessica’s allergy. As we don’t have any animals in the house, we decided she could stay with us. However, it was a very busy time of the year for everyone in our family, and subsequently we agreed that her stay with us would not be with a lot of visits to places in Denmark, but more for her to se how we live as a family in Denmark. We simply made the choice to be together and go to family reunions instead, and so we did.
The first two weeks of Jessica’s stay we spent getting to know each other. I remember when I stayed with a foreign family as an aupair girl in Switzerland – it’s a very strange feeling to be in someone else’s house, knowing that this is going to be your home for the next three months. We spoke English from the very start and never really came to speak Danish with her. This was not a problem to Daniel, who even increased his vocabulary in English over the 3½ months Jessica stayed with us. Benjamin, however just turned 10 and did not learn English in the school yet. But I think Benjamin picked up almost as many words in English as Jessica in Danish during her stay. We often spent a couple of hours talking after dinner in the evening.
It really is a new thing to have a 17 year old girl in the family, when you are used to young boys. Jessica is very independent and quickly learned to make her own sandwiches for school. She got up in the morning by herself and joined us for breakfast. Getting used to Danish food, however, demanded an effort you could tell. She really tried to taste everything, and was often surprised that different strange dishes were actually good! She could always turn to bread, butter and turkey, which was always available. We asked her what she wanted us to buy for food, and made sure that these things were always in the fridge.
I think Jessica quickly realised that a family in Denmark is not very different to families all over the world. Siblings fight and yell at each other, parents argue with the kids over stuff to be done, and boys in Denmark make a mess in their rooms – just as young girls from South Dakota, I realised. Kids will always be kids!
It was new to us that we had to decide when and where Jessica was allowed to go in the evening. Daniel and Benjamin only se their friends during the daytime. We wanted her to be able to join her friends from school, and we wanted to make sure that she was safe. On the other hand we, as a lot of other Danish parents, did not wish to bring her everywhere, as in Denmark we have a very good public traffic system with busses and trains running till late in the evening. We decided she should never go home alone, always stay with her friends, and if this failed, she should call us and we would come an pick her up. In our opinion she should be allowed to make new experiences, but not to the limit where it was not safe and sound. We were a little bit afraid that she would want to go out till late in the evening several days during the week-end, but luckily the money spent made a healthy limit to this.
As a caring mother I always spend time with my children, and of course this included Jessica. That I succeeded I could tell from the reaction of Daniel and Benjamin. After the first month they started to be jealous. Benjamin would interrupt when we spoke in English, and Daniel would ask why Jessica could in no time earn the same privileges as they had as my sons. Especially when we decided to throw a Halloween party for Jessica and her classmates. Daniel were really offended. “Why have I never been allowed to have a party”, he protested. “You never asked” I said. I appealed to their common sense and asked if they would not wish to have the same attention if they were all by them selves abroad, with no family or parents around. They accepted, but were happy to regain lost territory when they were all by themselves again. However, do not misunderstand – they look back on Jessica’s stay with us with a lot of joy and good memories. I think this was a good and healthy experience for the whole family – and I’m sure to Jessica as well.
We are all very happy that Jessica stayed with us, and I am positive that we will have another exchange student in the future. It also prepared us for the life with teenagers in the house, and we look forward to this.
We would love to keep in touch with Jessica and share the challenges and experiences in her future life.
Good luck – Jessica!
As Jessica’s first host family, we were very excited to meet her.
Ole, the host father told our sons, Daniel, now 14 years old and Benjamin, soon to be 11 years old, that they were about to have a sister. Both boys looked surprised at me, Maria - Mom, are you pregnant? No, I said, you are going to have an older sister, and we explained.
Our decision to have an exchange student came a little bit earlier than anticipated, as it turned out that almost any family with children in Denmark has a dog or a cat, which was a problem with Jessica’s allergy. As we don’t have any animals in the house, we decided she could stay with us. However, it was a very busy time of the year for everyone in our family, and subsequently we agreed that her stay with us would not be with a lot of visits to places in Denmark, but more for her to se how we live as a family in Denmark. We simply made the choice to be together and go to family reunions instead, and so we did.
The first two weeks of Jessica’s stay we spent getting to know each other. I remember when I stayed with a foreign family as an aupair girl in Switzerland – it’s a very strange feeling to be in someone else’s house, knowing that this is going to be your home for the next three months. We spoke English from the very start and never really came to speak Danish with her. This was not a problem to Daniel, who even increased his vocabulary in English over the 3½ months Jessica stayed with us. Benjamin, however just turned 10 and did not learn English in the school yet. But I think Benjamin picked up almost as many words in English as Jessica in Danish during her stay. We often spent a couple of hours talking after dinner in the evening.
It really is a new thing to have a 17 year old girl in the family, when you are used to young boys. Jessica is very independent and quickly learned to make her own sandwiches for school. She got up in the morning by herself and joined us for breakfast. Getting used to Danish food, however, demanded an effort you could tell. She really tried to taste everything, and was often surprised that different strange dishes were actually good! She could always turn to bread, butter and turkey, which was always available. We asked her what she wanted us to buy for food, and made sure that these things were always in the fridge.
I think Jessica quickly realised that a family in Denmark is not very different to families all over the world. Siblings fight and yell at each other, parents argue with the kids over stuff to be done, and boys in Denmark make a mess in their rooms – just as young girls from South Dakota, I realised. Kids will always be kids!
It was new to us that we had to decide when and where Jessica was allowed to go in the evening. Daniel and Benjamin only se their friends during the daytime. We wanted her to be able to join her friends from school, and we wanted to make sure that she was safe. On the other hand we, as a lot of other Danish parents, did not wish to bring her everywhere, as in Denmark we have a very good public traffic system with busses and trains running till late in the evening. We decided she should never go home alone, always stay with her friends, and if this failed, she should call us and we would come an pick her up. In our opinion she should be allowed to make new experiences, but not to the limit where it was not safe and sound. We were a little bit afraid that she would want to go out till late in the evening several days during the week-end, but luckily the money spent made a healthy limit to this.
As a caring mother I always spend time with my children, and of course this included Jessica. That I succeeded I could tell from the reaction of Daniel and Benjamin. After the first month they started to be jealous. Benjamin would interrupt when we spoke in English, and Daniel would ask why Jessica could in no time earn the same privileges as they had as my sons. Especially when we decided to throw a Halloween party for Jessica and her classmates. Daniel were really offended. “Why have I never been allowed to have a party”, he protested. “You never asked” I said. I appealed to their common sense and asked if they would not wish to have the same attention if they were all by them selves abroad, with no family or parents around. They accepted, but were happy to regain lost territory when they were all by themselves again. However, do not misunderstand – they look back on Jessica’s stay with us with a lot of joy and good memories. I think this was a good and healthy experience for the whole family – and I’m sure to Jessica as well.
We are all very happy that Jessica stayed with us, and I am positive that we will have another exchange student in the future. It also prepared us for the life with teenagers in the house, and we look forward to this.
We would love to keep in touch with Jessica and share the challenges and experiences in her future life.
Good luck – Jessica!
indsendt af Anonym kl.
7:52 AM
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